Young Again
This past year, I started volunteering as a tutor at an after-school program. It’s been one of the most challenging, fun, and unique journeys I’ve ever taken.
Sometimes these kids make me the most frustrated I’ve ever been. They hardly ever listen. They curse constantly. They are consistently disrespectful. I’m pretty sure over half of them lie about the amount of homework they have. My nerves are grinded each week.
But, in the midst of all the craziness, there are gems of moments that make it all worth it.
Gems like seeing 16-year-old Gordy listen to my encouragement to become a leader and inspire the kids around him to help clean the building. Gordy doesn’t realize it but people listen to him. They look at him and rely on him. He’s quiet and doesn’t cause trouble. But he’s a leader. And it was one of the coolest moments to see him embrace that.
Gems like having 15-year-old Joy asking me to help her pick a senior project. It required her to talk about her interests and passions. To listen to the pure, unadulterated dreams of a young teenager is the coolest thing ever. The world and its possibilities for greatness seem limitless through their eyes. And it reminds me that it still is. It reminds me that God can transform lives through someone’s passions no matter how old they are.
Gems like hearing 15-year-old Billy open up about how hard life is with his Dad gone. Knowing that he trusts me enough with that pain; that vulnerability. Being able to just listen. And encourage him that it gets better.
I might not get to tell each of these kids about Jesus every day, but I look forward to these moments when I know they can see and feel Jesus in our conversations.
I look at these incredible teenagers, and it makes me regret how much I wasted my teenage years. I look back on those years with disdain. They weren’t very fun for me. They were hard. And lonely. If I was young again, I would open up. I would trust people so much more. I’m sure there were people that attempted to pour into my life during those times that I ignored.
I wouldn’t ignore them now. And I plan on making it as hard as possible for these kids to ignore me.
Because as much as they might not realize it now, they need connection. They need conversations that show them Jesus.
I’m not giving up.